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Wednesday, May 22, 2013
Funerals and ritualsPosted Wednesday, August 26, 2009, at 5:03 PM
My family has had several deaths in the past months and it has lead me to observation of people and the grief process.
I see several interesting traits among families and the south.
I have lived in several different cultures and every culture has a different way of expressing grief and letting a loved one go.
In the South I have noticed a interesting practice, people pull over and stop when a caravan of hearse and mourners come by. Where I used to live that would have gotten you ticketed or in the same boat as the dead guy. It is a interesting practice. I have almost ran over some folks in the past until i got this down pat.
Is this a law here in the south or a courtsey?
Southerners also bring food. LOTS of food for the family which is a nice thing, except when you have had fried chicken for 3 days in a row.
The viewing is a interesting thing. It is not a sorrowful affair as you might think.
People come and go and register in a book. They chat and eat.. children play.
It reeks of formaldehyde and flowers. People share stories if the deceased and cry with one another.
Southerners also have cool tombstones.
My grandfather passed away the day before my birthday. He was so ready to go. He was 96 and since my grandmother had passed in February he just did not want to live any longer.
I can understand that.
Dealing with the death and the estate can be a over whelming thing for the living. I have been praying for my aunties whom are dealing with a lot on their plates right now.
Everyone goes through the process of grief differently.
What are some of your customs and traditions in the funeral process? For some it was a celebration of life lived, for others is is a devastation of a life cut short too soon.
I have instructed my son on what i want when i am dead.
No sappy music, play Jimi Hendrix, Doors and The Final Countdown.
Instead of flowers to flood someone's house, give to a charity like Tabby's Place or the Humane association. the living need stuff I don't.
Put a joke on my headstone.. please.. don't be so serious.
Everyone party, I may have left left you money.
Do NOT bury me in a dress, I will come back to haunt you. Leather, black something.. no dress.
Oh, and let me know if my tattoo's look ok with embalming fluid.
Have a happy day.
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Lesa Cox has owned a cleaning service and a bookstore; now, she repairs and maintains computers for the elderly and others on a fixed income. She enjoys animals, gardening, books and fixing old cars. She and her husband have one son, who suffers from Asperger's syndrome.
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