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Saturday, Apr. 19, 2014

Dumb, hungry and sleepy

Posted Thursday, September 18, 2008, at 4:14 PM

I'm not, and we shouldn't, brag about it but we used to have burglars here who did some dumb, brazen and orginal things.

During the many years I covered the police beat and also took evidence photos for law enforcement, I saw so many strange actions by burglars it's difficult to single out a few. I could easily list hundreds of them..

Under the category of dumb burglars, one of the more unusual was the man who decided to enter a building that was undergoing some construction work. He used a ladder workers had left and climbed to the high roof to make a rooftop entry.

Oh, he was careful, so he pushed the ladder over after reaching the roof so police on night patrol wouldn't notice anything unusual. He broke through the roof, stole some items and went back to the roof to come down...but remembered too late he had pushed the ladder over. He was sitting on the roof, freezing the cursing, when spotted the following morning.

I still don't understand why he didn't go back inside the building and find another, and warmer way out.

One of the most brazen burglars was the man who broke into a restaurant three times over a span of about 10 days. He didn't take anything from the restaurant but he sure didn't leave hungry.

In fact, he fixed himself a really fine dinner each time and dined by candlelight. He was so ungrateful he didn't wash the dirty cooking utensils and dishes before leaving but he did put out the candle on table. I always think of him as our gourmet burglar.

One of the most unusual burglaries involved a young man who broke through the roof of a drug store. He was trapped by police between the roof and ceiling directly over the pharmacy area. They removed some sections of the ceiling and got him down while he cursed them for coming into his home and waking him up at that time of the morning. I suppose we should consider him a our sleepwaking burgllar.


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LoL there are some dumb criminals out there for sure.

From America's Dumbest Criminals:

Oklahoma City: Dennis Newton was on trial for the armed robbery of a convenience store in district court when he fired his lawyer. Assistant district attorney Larry Jones said Newton, 47, was doing a fair job of defending himself until the store manager testified that Newton was the robber. Newton jumped up, accused the woman of lying and then said, "I should of blown your (expletive) head off." The defendant paused, then quickly added, "If I'd been the one that was there." The jury took 20 minutes to convict Newton and recommended a 30-year sentence.

And My Fav:

San Francisco: A man, wanting to rob a downtown Bank of America, walked into the branch and wrote "this iz a stikkup. Put all your muny in this bag." While standing in line, waiting to give his note to the teller, he began to worry that someone had seen him write the note and might call the police before he reached the teller window. So he left the Bank of America and crossed the street to Wells Fargo. After waiting a few minutes in line, he handed his note to the Wells Fargo teller. She read it and, surmising from his spelling errors that he was not the brightest light in the harbor, told him that she could not accept his stickup note because it was written on a Bank of America deposit slip and that he would either have to fill out a Wells Fargo deposit slip or go back to Bank of America. Looking somewhat defeated, the man said "OK" and left. The Wells Fargo teller then called the police who arrested the man a few minutes later, as he was waiting in line back at Bank of America.

-- Posted by Dianatn on Thu, Sep 18, 2008, at 7:56 PM

Bo, I find it funny that you post this blog the same day that Moto is on the front page.

-- Posted by Justunjust on Thu, Sep 18, 2008, at 8:41 PM

Bo, I find it funny that you post this blog the same day that Moto is on the front page.

-- Posted by Justunjust on Thu, Sep 18, 2008, at 8:42 PM

Dianatn, the posts you made are hilarious. I can't believe the bank robber fell for that line. I have to say it was quick thinking by the teller. I like reading stuff like this. It makes all the arguing over dogs go away and makes everyone laugh!!

-- Posted by candasons07 on Fri, Sep 19, 2008, at 3:58 PM

April 2005; Rogersville, Tennessee: Hawkins County authorities were tipped off to two would-be burglars' plans to steal a refrigerator from a mobile home dealership when a cell phone one of the crooks was carrying in his front pocket relayed a 40-minute-long discussion about the upcoming heist to 911 dispatchers. (The phone was of a type that automatically calls 911 when the '9' key is held down.) Sheriff's deputies hid in the woods near the dealership and nabbed the hapless thieves as they exited one of the mobile homes with a refrigerator and set it on the ground outside.

-- Posted by time2relax on Fri, Sep 19, 2008, at 4:27 PM

WOW !! I find it amazing that we have all these replys after Moto was caught breaking the law AGAIN. Maybe some of this excuse energy should be spent helping him straighten his life out instead of making excuses for him, its not like this hasn't been happening for years...don't you think that would make more sense ??

-- Posted by SteelerT on Mon, Sep 22, 2008, at 11:06 PM


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Bo Melson is a retired sports and police beat editor of the Times-Gazette.
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