Embracing your inner albatross

I learned some very revealing information about myself and others at a management seminar Thursday.

The seminar was made available through the Southern Newspaper Publishers Association Foundation's Traveling Campus, and was held at the Chattanooga Times Free Press. Consultant William I. Beauchamp (pronounced Beecham) led the seminar.

We took a personality test that consisted of 18 questions designed to pigeon-hole us into one of four quadrants on a grid, which were labeled Peacock, Eagle, Owl and Dove.

Half of the test was set up to determine whether we were Supportive or Controlling, and the other half was set up to determine whether we were Direct or Indirect. After taking the test, we plotted our scores on the grid to see which quadrant we fell into.

In the upper right were the Peacocks, which have high marks in being Supportive and Direct; in the lower right were the Eagles, which scored high in being Controlling and Direct.

In the lower left were the Owls, which scored high in being Controlling and Indirect; and in the upper left were the Doves, which scored high in being Supportive and Indirect.

All of the personality types have qualities that can be viewed as either positive or negative, depending on the situation and the observer's personality type. In general, the polar opposites (Eagles versus Doves or Peacocks versus Owls) have the hardest time understanding each other.

Peacocks tend to be spontaneous, dislike being alone, are dreamers, jump from one activity to another, seek esteem and acknowledgement, and have good persuasive skills.

Eagles tend to be decisive, controlling, independant and competitive, have a low tolerance for others' feelings and advice, and have good administrative skills.

Owls tend to be cautious, like organization and structure, prefer an intellectual work environment, and have good problem solving skills.

Doves tend to be slow at taking action and making decisions, like close personal relationships, support and actively listen to others, seek security and belongingness, and have good counseling skills.

It's important to note that a person can train himself to act like another bird, but may come across as an Albatross, and not too genuine.

So it turns out that I'm a Peacock, which will come as no surprise to my friends and co-workers.

I'm the guy who likes to tell stories, shares his personal feelings, expresses his opinions readily, and digresses often from conversations. When speaking, I use lots of vocal inflection, more pitch variation, higher volume, animated facial expressions, and lots of hand and body movement. I can certainly be dramatic.

During the seminar, Beauchamp used a funny description of Peacocks that caused me and our general manager, William Mitchell, to burst into laughter. He said Peacocks can sometimes seem a little "light in the pants."

Now, most guys would take exception to this, but I thought it was funny. Anyone who knows me well would have no doubt as to my heterosexual orientation (I sound like Seinfeld character George Costanza here), but I have recently been accused of being a "metrosexual."

A "metro" is a heterosexual guy who displays characteristics and interests stereotypically assigned to men who may be a little "light in the pants." A metrosexual man is more likely to enjoy shopping, fashion and craft projects -- the very things a "macho" man can't stand.

We tend to be the perpetual "Awwwww" guys. Women think we're fun to hang out with, but not the kind of guy they want to date. Big, cute and harmless. Like pandas.

During my 20s, and somewhat in my 30s, I struggled with who I was. I always wanted to be like the macho guys, but I didn't quite fit in.

Today, however, I am learning to embrace myself as who I am. I can watch Project Runway while drinking a Café Latté following my Zumba class, and be completely comfortable with who I am.

I am no longer an Albatross.

I did virtually no exercise this week and my eating was out of control, yet I somehow managed to lose three pounds since last week and now weigh 228.

-- John Philleo is editor of the Times-Gazette. He can be reached at (931) 684-1200, ext. 218, or by e-mail at editor@t-g.com.