If I ran Food Network ....

The premiere of a new season of "The Next Food Network Star" only serves to remind me of some of my qualms, previously expressed here, about the direction the channel has taken the past few years. But what would I do if I were running things?

Here are some things that would be on my "to do" list if I woke up tomorrow as the channel's CEO.

1) The "In The Kitchen" channel. I recognize that competition shows and flashier cooking shows aren't going away overnight. But it occurs to me that Food Network now has a huge library of cooking shows -- a library that in theory has a pretty long shelf life. Cartoon Network originally started as an outlet for older Hanna-Barbera cartoons; when it moved on to hipper, newer product, it started a second channel, Boomerang, as an outlet for running and re-running those older shows. Food Network could easily do the same thing, creating a digital-tier channel with which to present all how-to cooking shows, 24 hours a day. They wouldn't have to produce much new programming; they have plenty of content already in the vaults.

2) Start a clip show. Speaking of those vaults, there's probably room for a show, either on the main network or on that new channel, which would re-package and combine clips from those old shows in new ways. For example, you could do an episode on chili that would show edited-down clips of Alton Brown and Emeril Lagasse and Tyler Florence and Rachael Ray making chili on episodes of their shows, letting people compare and contrast different approaches to the same dish or ingredient. Comedy Central has done this sort of clip-show thing several times, the most notable example being "Short Attention Span Theater" and the most recent being "Comedy Central Remix."

3) Hire Marvin Woods. I loved Woods' show "Home Plate" on the old Turner South channel and was surprised he didn't either go to PBS or Food Network when Turner South was sold to FOX and adopted an all-sports format.

4) Feature Asian cooking. Since the departure of Ming Tsai, FN hasn't has any regular outlet for Asian recipes. Some of the generalists occasionally try Asian recipes, but I think it's about time to try another series, even if it's only limited-run. Of course, I liked Ming Tsai and was sorry his show went away.

5) Start "The Viewer's Guide To Food Network." There are certain basic assumptions made by some of the FN chefs that are occasionally, but not consistently, explained, and I think it would be a great idea to have a special that collects them all in one place, and also gives shopping and kitchen equipment tips. Why should you only cook with wine you would drink? How can you find exotic ingredients in small towns without specialty food markets? Why kosher salt? What are some easy substitutions you can make? Why do the FN chefs all use gas burners, and what do you need to do differently on electric burners? You get the idea. The special could be re-run every couple of months but also be made available for viewing any time at the FN web site, with supporting web content.

Those are my ideas; you may have your own. But I don't think I'll get the chance to implement them any time soon.

Food on film

The Belcourt Theatre in Nashville will present "Food on Film," a series of food-related documentaries, beginning Friday, June 26.

"Food Inc.," running June 26-July 2, is an exposé of the U.S. food industry, accusing major corporations of putting profit ahead of consumer health. It was directed by Robert Kenner.

"End of the Line" (June 28-29) is about overfishing, and the projection that the planet could run out of seafood by 2048. It's narrated by "Cheers" star Ted Danson.

"Pressure Cooker" (June 30-July 1) is about three Philadelphia high school students going through a sort of culinary boot camp.

"The Garden" (July 1-2) is a look at the largest community garden in the U.S., in south central Los Angeles, and the controversies it created.

Ticket prices for matinee screenings are $6.25 for adults, $5.75 for students, senior citizens, active military, Belcourt Theatre members or children.

Evening screenings are $8.50 for adults, $6.25 for students, seniors and active military, and $5.75 for Belcourt Theatre members or children.

For more information, call (615) 383-9140 or go to www.belcourt.org. The theatre is located at 2102 Belcourt Avenue, just off 21st Avenue South near Vanderbilt University in Nashville.

--John I. Carney is city editor of the Times-Gazette and covers county government. He is also the author of the self-published novel "Soapstone." His personal web site is lakeneuron.com.