Oh boy! Another girl would be just fine

Lately, a lot of people have asked me if we know whether the baby I'm carrying is a boy or a girl.

I don't know yet, but I will be finding out in the next few weeks.

Research suggests we'll have another girl, because we've had two already, our 6-year-old and our baby that was stillborn. Studies show that people who have two babies of one gender are 85 percent more likely to have another baby of that same gender.

I know girls. Another girl would be easy for me, but on the other hand, I wouldn't mind the experience of raising a boy.

Usually, my family has a large number of girls, but over the past few years, those numbers have gradually shifted to the boys' side. Another girl would help even out the numbers a little, but more boys are good, too.

Honestly, though, I have no preference either way, but some people do, especially my in-laws.

When I was pregnant with Tessa, we called my in-laws to tell them we had found out she was going to be a girl. I told my father-in-law we were all thrilled.

He said, "All except Brian. He must have wanted a boy."

He didn't, though. He's just as happy with his girl as he would have been with any boy.

They recently visited for Tessa's sixth birthday. We talked about the baby, and they asked Tessa what she wanted the baby to be, a boy or a girl.

In fact, my mother-in-law said, "You don't want an old sister. You know you want a brother."

Tessa later told me, "I already have a sister, so a brother would be good. I'd like to have a sister here with me. Maybe you could have twins?"

She really liked that theory, but since we know for sure there is only one baby, I had to shoot that one out of the water.

On an online discussion board for women that I visit, I've seen several posts lately about women who are very disappointed by the gender of their baby. Some of them have even cried for days about it.

I want to tell them to snap out of it and that they'll love whatever they have. It's hard for me to have any sympathy in this situation.

Maybe it's because we have so much trouble getting pregnant or because we lost a baby last year, but I seriously could care less what flavor this baby is.

The only reason I'm finding out is I'm a planner and want to be able to buy gender-specific clothing and items. Plus, I want to be able to pick out a name and call the baby by that name for the rest of the pregnancy.

I've heard many pros and cons over the last few weeks for both genders.

Here are a few for girls:

• Girls will take care of you when you're older.
• Girls don't make as much of a mess as boys. (I KNOW this one is false.)
• Girls will be your best friend when they grow up.
• Girls are easier as teenagers.
• Girls' clothes are so much cuter.
• Girls are drama queens. (I know this one is true.)
• Girls are harder as teenagers.
• Girls love daddy more than momma.

Here are a few for the boys.

• Boys and their mothers have a special relationship.
• Boys are snugglers.
• Boys are very independent.
• Boys are easier as teenagers.
• Boys' clothes just aren't as cute.
• Boys are more likely to put you in a nursing home when you get older. (I know the person who told me this one was kidding, but it stuck with me.)
• Boys are too hyper, break everything and are always into something.
• Boys are harder as teenagers. (I've gotten conflicting reports on both of these.)

With a list like this, it's a wonder anyone has children. I'm sure many childless couples seek out a pet over a baby after talking to their friends with children.

In the end, even those who are very disappointed in the gender of their baby will love that baby as soon as it's born.

Boy or girl -- it won't matter. All they'll see is love in a teeny, tiny face.

--Tamara Belinc is a staff writer. She can be reached at tbelinc@t-g.com.